'We paid for your childhood, now it's your turn': Entitled mom expects 26-year-old daughter to pay her bills and cover the cost of flights and hotels for a European family vacation because she paid for her as a kid

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jun 12, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

Parents are not entitled to be reimbursed for raising their children. They know that when they sign up to become parents, they're not signing up for something that will make them money, unless they are planning to monetize their child through baby modeling, child acting, or family influencer marketing. In most cases, kids are a surefire way for your extra cash to go down the drain, but you love them anyway. The value they bring to your life is far greater than the value of paper money stacks. However, there are still many parents who expect their children to fully support them in their old age because they raised them. While some aging parents come on hard times and have no choice but to ask their kids to support them, some parents plan it out from the start, feeling no shame about taking their kids' hard-earned income for their selfish purposes. 

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my mom that I’m not responsible for her?

    Ever since I graduated college and started making money, my mom expects me to financially support her. I treat her often because I appreciate all she did raising me, but it feels like she uses that as a lifelong excuse.
    via u/nillacrackers

  • The young woman in this story is struggling to say no to her mom, who thinks she needs to be compensated for the years spent raising her kid. Her mom expects her daughter to fully pay for European vacations for the whole family, just because she financed family vacations when she was a kid. 

  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10516423680
    via Daniele La Rosa Messina

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    She asked me to pay rent when I lived at home, so I moved out. When she visits me in the city (at her own request), she expects me to pay for all meals because she's the guest. If she gives me a ride (even though I insisted on taking
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 04
    the train back home), she expects lunch or a gift in return. Because she drove me. I never asked her to?? It's not like she doesn't have money—she constantly buying luxury items for herself, but she acts like treating me is "a waste."
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 05
    I'm already covering our family's phone plan, my parents' and our pets' insurance. I'm grateful that I'm in a position where I can afford to provide for them while also maxing out my 401k and investing but I also want to prioritize my own future. She guilt-trips me constantly with, "We paid for your childhood, now it's your turn."
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 06
    5
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 07
    We're planning a Europe trip that she suggested, and when it came time to book, she just stared at me. I ended up offering to cover everyone's flights and hotels. But instead of being thankful, she acts like it's expected. She was like "oh yeah we payed for all the family trips when you were little"
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10516432128
    via Derek Thomson

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09
    When I brought it up, she got defensive, saying she deserves to spend her money on herself now as she sacrificed so much for us while we were young. She paid for our sport lessons, tutors, vacations, etc. and I'm selfish for not doing this one thing for my family.
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 10
    What really got to me was when I asked for input on the trip plans and she replied, "I planned everything when you were kids. Now it's your turn." That made me snap. I told her, "You chose to be a mom. I didn't ask for any of that. I'm grateful, but you can't keep throwing it in my face. You're going on this trip too. I'm happy to plan the itinerary but contribute to it"
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 11
    She hasn't replied and we haven't talked in a week. Am I just being bratty? Are adult kids really supposed to shoulder this much for their parents if they provided a lot during childhood?"
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 12
    Edit note: I make more than my parents combined. If that changes any opinions. But I'm also only in my mid-late 20s. I love my parents so much but I feel like a cash cow sometimes. I'm conflicted.
    via u/nillacrackers
  • 13
    VPR2012 Time to cancel the trip and cut your losses. This is so toxic. you are NTA. You are absolutely right, your mom CHOSE to be a mom, and she shouldn't want you to spend your hard earned money on her, she should want you to invest in your future.
    via u/VPR2012
  • 14
    attilathejen And when she flips out at the cancellation, tell her you really took her words to heart and thought about everything she had to pay for when you were a child, and in this economy you have to save every penny for your future children. You do NOT have to specify if they will be human, animal or even plant children. :) NTA.
    via u/attilathejen
  • 15
    ErikLovemonger Or even better, OP can say now that she's a legal adult, she'd like to cancel those illegal contracts that she apparently made with her mom for all those tutoring services, sports services etc because minors cannot sign contracts. Mom, you go get a refund on all those expenses and I'll stop paying for your current expenses. Now we're even and let's start at 0. Oh, that doesn't work for you?
    via u/ErikLovemonger
  • 16
    bfjizzle I'm 43, I literally have to fight with my parents just to let me buy them dinner. This is crazy. OP's mom is really manipulative and insanely entitled
    via u/bfjizzle
  • 17
    dennisxesjje56 Honestly, I've been feeling that too like no matter how much I give, it's never enough because she's convinced I owe her for simply raising me. I didn't ask to be born into some lifelong debt contract. It sks because I love her, but it's draining when love starts feeling like a transaction.
    via u/dennisxesjje56
  • 18
    OkeyDokey654 NTA. She paid for your upbringing because that was literally her legal responsibility. She doesn't get brownie points for raising her child. Now, if you want to support her, that's great. But you don't owe her anything just because she fed and housed her kid.
    via u/OkeyDokey654
  • 19
    Devotchka Mozg34 I've seen this before, where the parents treat it as a transactional relationship. Like I did all this stuff for you, now you have to help me do xyz, you owe me. My husband's mom had a job cleaning offices at night and she would make him come along- even after college for no pay. He had gotten a regular day job and asked his mother if they could
    via u/DevotchkaMozg34
  • 20
    go clean the offices earlier in the evening (like 6-7 pm instead of 9) because he needed to be up early the next day. She got so mad at him and wouldn't speak to him for a year. Thankfully, she was cut off early before my son was born. Also, she's de d now. Relieved for all her drama to be over.
    via u/DevotchkaMozg34
  • 21
    Zazzog "You chose to be a mom. I didn't ask for any of that. I'm grateful, but you can't keep throwing it in my face." You said it. NTA.
    via u/Zazzog
  • 22
    He_Who_Is_Person NTA I hate attitudes of parents that because they brought a child into this world, the child owes them everything. No, the parent chose to bring a sentient being into
    via u/He_Who_Is_Person
  • 23
    existence without it having any say, and then governed that being for 18 years. That the parent supports their child is a duty. I (42m) will certainly never treat my son this way. He didn't ask to be born anymore than I did.
    via u/He_Who_Is_Person
  • 24
    aWomanOnTheEdge Yes, and tell that freeloading mother of yours that it's your turn to save money FOR YOUR OWN children. Cut. That. Entitled. Worthless. Mother. Of. Yours. OFF.
    via u/aWomanOnTheEdge
  • 25
    R4eth God, I are not entitled to your money. You're not "required" to treat them because they raised you at their own expense. You literally owe them exactly zero. Nothing. I'm de d serious. Cancel the whole trip and book yourself a vacation all on your own. They can pay their own way from now on. You "owe" them jack squat. Take your mother's silence as a sign to cut her off hate parents like this. Nta. Your parents completely. She wants to be a part of your life then she can stop acting like an
    via u/R4eth

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family drama entitled parents mother childhood entitled parent bad parenting bad parents parenting family mom money Parenting Fail entitled people Parenting FAILS vacation
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